Monday, April 7, 2008

Memphis-Kansas first half

18:38 (left in the half) – Memphis scores after the ball bounces off an official’s foot, thereby stopping it from careening out of bounds. There are so many obvious jokes I could make about referees and yet I can’t think of any of them and I don’t think anyone really wants to read one anyway.

16:20 – Kansas goes down 9-3… a deficit CBS announces is the Jayhawks’ largest of the tournament. Clearly the game is over.

15:36 – It’s 9-5 at the first timeout. I have high hopes that this game will be better than the abominations that have been the title games from 2004-2007, but my confidence would be boosted by Kansas figuring out how to not mishandle the ball every possession.

15:12 – Kaun may have the ugliest looking alley oops I’ve ever seen. It just doesn’t seem plausible that he can get that high off the ground. This is the second alley oop I’ve seen him make this tournament and while this one was far less goofy looking, I think he’d fit in better if he lost his muscle mass, donned some short-shorts and went back in time to play basketball in the 1970s.

13:21 – Tie game, 11-11. Last decent championship game I remember seeing was 2003. That one had Kansas in it too. Good omen?

8:47 – I’m beginning to suspect that the ball is coated in butter.

8:20 – Brandon Rush to Darrell Arthur for an alley oop that doesn’t look nearly as impossible as Kaun’s… by which I mean Arthur didn’t appear to need the help of wires to lift him from the ground. 22-15 in favor of Kansas for Memphis’s biggest deficit of the tournament.

Commercial note – It’s disappointing to see the same old ads I see all the time on TV. I know this isn’t the Super Bowl, but I still feel like it’s an event that deserves something new in the way of corporate sponsorship. That’s likely to be the toughest stance I take all game long. I’m known for my gritty analysis.

7:25 – Oh! Look at that! Roy Williams is in the stands. He’s wearing a very forced smile. I wonder why…

6:20 – Memphis back in front 26-24. I honestly don’t even know how that happened. Perhaps Williams has re-assumed control of the team.

4:46 – Douglas-Roberts has 13. There must be someone out there wondering why CBS has combined their point totals.

1:43 – I don’t think I’ve ever seen so many big men hustle in one game. I thought what I learned from watching Duke’s Brian Zoubek all season long is that big men are supposed to stand in the lane and then deposit the ball out of bounds repeatedly before they’re removed from the game after 30 seconds of playing time. Coach K should maybe look into Kansas’s strategy…

0:00.1 – Memphis determines that taking a shot with the final possession really isn’t worth the effort. The score at halftime: 33-28 Kansas.

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